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My reading list grows exponentially. Everytime I read a book, it'll mention three other books I feel I have to read. It's like a particularly relentless series of pop-up ads.
-A.J. Jacobs

Sunday, March 14, 2010

PG Love Scene Blogfest

So basically, I'm an idiot. I'll just fess up to that right now. I didn't read the directions for this blogfest correctly. I definitely wouldn't have signed up for it had I know what I was supposed to do (sorry guys). When I saw that it had to be MG, I didn't read much further and just assumed that we were talking MG. I know my MG. And I can guarantee you that there is no way that there'd be a llluuuurrrvvveee scene for ages 9-14 to read. *shrugs* I even talked my fabulous crit partner into writing one, of course giving her the wrong impression. Sorry Kristen!! Forgive me!!

So now that I've confessed what an idiot I am, I'm going to break the rules, cause I'm a rebel like that, and post what I thought I was supposed to do. This is a PG MG Kiss Scene from The Post-It Bandits. There is no llluuuurrrvvveee going on here...

***

Cam was hamming it up with the guys when he noticed Jordan leaning up against the lockers, motioning for him to come over. One lone finger beckoned him. He decided it’d be best to ignore her. He was finally in good with the guys; he had no desire for her to ruin that.

However, Jordan wasn’t willing to back down, so she stalked over to the group and stood firm in her demand.

“We need to talk,” Jordan hissed.

Her voice was the exact opposite of calm and quiet. The guys started laughing, slapping Cam on the back.

“Cam’s the man!” someone shouted from behind him.

Jordan rolled her eyes.

“I’m a little busy here. Maybe we can meet up later.” Right as the words escaped Cam’s mouth; he wished he could take them back. She’d never hurt a fly and there he was acting like a complete jerk all in the name of coolness.

So when she grabbed Cam by the collar and dragged him outside, he didn’t protest much.

They stood facing each other, in a standoff. Cam became defensive immediately. He’d been jumpy and on guard since the first break in. Even so, this confrontation was long past due.

“What’s the big deal?” Cam asked, even though he knew exactly what she had yanked him out here for.

“I know that being a part of the brainless Apes over there is a dream come true for you. So congratulations.”

Cam folded his arms across his chest. What was that supposed to mean?

Jordan continued, “Blowing me off is one thing, but it’s a whole different story when I start hearing rumors of what you’ve been doing with the Apes. Or for them, is more like it.” She arched an eyebrow.

Cam’s heart sped up, but he quickly retorted. “You’re just jealous.”

“Oh. That’s bull and you know it.”

Cam unfolded his arms and picked at the skin around his fingernails, but Jordan didn’t change her stance. Her hands were on her hips, determined to get an answer out of him.

She squinted her eyes at him and heaved a deep sigh. Her shoulders dropped and she softened when he was unable to meet her eyes. “You’re better than that, Cam. They’re just using you.”

Her words stung, because he knew deep down that they were true.

Cam met her eyes and the weirdest thing happened. Suddenly he wasn’t looking at ex best friend Jordan, the tomboy he’d grown up with. She was a girl – a pretty one at that, who was standing before him with all the genuine concern in the world.

The Karate Kid practiced a slew of martial arts kicks inside his stomach and his palms began to sweat. Never in a million years did he expect to look at her in any form other than the kid he made mud pies with on rainy days. And yet, there he was struck dumb by the strange new feelings stirring inside of him.

Jordan must have recognized the wordless transition, because she narrowed her eyebrows at him. It was her turn to play dumb. “What?”

Before he could think through what he was about to do, he leaned over and kissed her. Jordan’s face turned bright red as she stumbled back. “Whoa.”

No words could process correctly in his brain and so he just repeated her. “Whoa.”
They stood in an awkward I-can’t-believe-we-just-kissed silence.

23 brilliant remarks:

Kristen said...

Hello there fellow Rebel ;)
I loved this! I don't know if I'm more impressed or disturbed by how well you channel your inner little boy (LOL!!!). It was awesome and very realistic!
I love Jordan and how she tells it like it is and doesn't put up with Cam's crap. :) Can't wait to read more!!

Shannon Messenger said...

Aw, don't worry Tiffany. I *don't* think it was supposed to be 9-14 year olds doing the act (MAN I HOPE NOT, or this will land some of us on the FBI watch list for SURE) Course, I TOTALLY cheated and found a loophole and ran with it. *blushes*

But I'm glad you still posted this. Well done you!

Tina Lynn said...

"Whoa!"<---I'm pretty sure that's what I was thinking (if I didn't vocalize it) after my first kiss. I really love how he realizes how much he likes her and then just goes for it without sitting on his feelings. Whether or not you broke the rules, I loved this piece:) Yay!

sarahjayne smythe said...

Rebel, rebel. :) I liked this very much. And I don't read MG.

Piedmont Writer said...

I got mine wrong too, but I like this. Very nice. Congratulations.

maybe genius said...

Oh hey, we both wrote about a Cam! I forget if I already knew if that was your MC's name or not... :) I wrote a cute kissing scene too before I realized what it was actually supposed to be, heh. Oops.

This is an adorable scene. I love the Karate Kid doing kicks in his stomach!

Christine Danek said...

Hey there! Great job! Really cute. I really enjoyed this.

Livia said...

I like the "I can't believe we just kissed" silence. :-)

Kimberly Franklin said...

Breaking the rules is half the fun! Great job!

laurel said...

Love the voice, here, Tiffany. And your hilarious description of Cam's nervousness. Golden, simply golden.

Gavin said...

That was really cute, Tiffany. So despite you misreading the rules, this piece came out awesome. (:

Portia said...

For middle grade THE KISS is a big deal, right?! I adored it. Perfect for the audience, and fun too.

Frankie Diane Mallis said...

awww very cute and innocent!

VR Barkowski said...

Lovely job portraying the awkwardness of a first kiss! Absolutely charming and perfectly MG.

LK Gardner-Griffie said...

So very sweet. I really enjoyed it. Great job.

Melissa said...

Nothing wrong with being a rebel:) Anyways, I love this scene!

Sara McClung ♥ said...

PG Love Fest rebels UNITE :-) This was really sweet <3

DL Hammons said...

I didn't sign up for this blogfest, si I'm not sure what the confusion is about. But I can totally see you being the REBEL regardless of the cause. :)

Anyway...I really liked this scene. My favorite part...

So when she grabbed Cam by the collar and dragged him outside, he didn’t protest much. Perfect.

Tiffany Neal said...

Thanks guys for making me want to be a rebel more often!! :)

It is absolutely crazy that writing from a middle school boy's point of view is coming so naturally! :)

I am glad you enjoyed it even if I did cheat!

Nicole Ducleroir said...

The fluidity with which you write is fantastic. You captured this scene with incredible authenticity. Loved it!!

Thanks for sending me a friend invitation through GoodReads! As soon as I figure out how to accept, I will. LOL! Somedays, technology stymies me :P

'Til then!
((hugs)) Nicole

Hayley said...

I thought it applied to YA and MG (but honestly 9-14 doing that I really hope not) so I did a YA scene but I really liked this it was cute and definetly a PG MG scene nice job!

Melanie Sherman said...

Thanks for breaking the rules. I did too. I really liked this. I'm dying to know more about what he is doing with the bad boy club. I can see this in a book! AND I want to know the reactions of the boys. Heh heh. Very nice.

Jen said...

Tag you're it! Come check out my blog!